Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Mr. V. Rama Moorthy

1912 - 2002

To my dearest thatha,

That is how you would address your letters to loved ones. It has been 4 years since you went away from us. This is to let you know that you are sorely missed and dearly loved today and forever.

Chita puta rotti lotti:
That is how you called me.
You taught me the story of two parrots. The story was about how their contrasting upbringing shaped their lives. The parrot who grew up with the butcher would always say 'hodi, kadi, kollu'. The parrot who grew up with the saint would say the sweetest of things. The story fetched me a prize at the Chinmaya Mission story telling contest. Probably going by the moral of the story I never heard you say a harsh word. You wouldn’t allow anyone to punish or even raise their voice against us grandkids.

“One of the most powerful handclasps is that of a new grandbaby around the finger of a grandfather” -- Joy Hargrove

Some of my earliest memories of you include hopping on to the chauffer driven ambassador with you. You would take Vishnu and me to the Gandhi Bazaar market area. You would have a long list of supplies to be bought for your parents’ ceremonies. Puttasiddappana angadi was your favourite. He was a premium quality grocer with everything under the sun. I distinctly remember the owner and his two sons. As you read from your list they would scream out to their assistants “2 kg togribele kodappa, next yen saar, amele 5 kg akki kodappa”. I would stand there next to you barely the height of the counter struggling to catch a glimpse of the store. Tiptoed I would look at the cashews and nuts galore on display in awe. The best part of the whole day was when you would buy us and mom 3 Cadbury Fruit and Nut bars! You would carefully check the date of expiry on the bars before handing them out to us.

I can picture your room with pictures of ajji, keshavdas and a file cabinet filled with papers and files. I would come up there to get Treptin cookies you kept in one of the cupboards! You had a treasury in another cupboard for which the key was hooked to your janivaara.

“What children need most are the essentials that grandparents provide in abundance. They give unconditional love, kindness, patience, humor, comfort, lessons in life. And, most importantly, cookies” -- Rudolph Giuliani

In the mornings, I remember you descending the stairs to the main hall of ‘Mathrunilaya’ in one of your fine safaris filling the air with your characteristic perfume. My olfactory sense till date tingles with those scents. You would then set out to the Builders Society conference or an APS College Board meeting.

I remember the tears of joy in your eyes when I got my SSLC results. You were so proud and said it is a fantastic achievement given that I didn’t take any tuition. You wouldn’t remember names of my friends who came home often or what I was studying due to the short term memory loss. But you never forgot one thing. Whenever you wore that brown full sleeve shirt, I said “You look really smart in this shirt thatha”. And you would say “Of course, I have to, because you bought me this shirt from Bombay”!

“They say genes skip generations. It's one of nature's ways that we often feel closer to distant generations than to the generation immediately preceding us” -- Igor Stravinsky
Pic: L To R, standing: Sukanya atte, Prabhu chix, Vishnu & me. Sitting: Dad, Thatha, Mum

At the dining table for breakfast, lunch or dinner, you always used to call out for us to join you. I can never forget how you repeatedly called out ‘putshubu bangaru baaro’ till I came there. You insisted that we eat on time and sleep on time. In the dining hall, seated in our respective seats, I remember how we used to laugh, laugh so hard that your eyes would water. I often I ran into arguments with you, dad or Vishnu on different things. You told me that I could become a good lawyer. A fan of Indira Gandhi’s dynamism you told me to join politics and become a national leader! You somehow thought everything was achievable. You believed in me.

“Man is made by his belief. As he believes, so he is” -- Bhagavad Gita

Giving was a rule:
Your evenings were always busy with visitors calling on you. Nobody left without a cuppa. Either they asked for a seat for their son in the college or sought a job or asked for a loan. You were always willing to help people in need. Your generous ways benefited countless many. I have heard how you and ajji offered shelter to many relatives. You provided them with the basics so that they could build their lives. You funded their kids’ education. You even employed a couple of your nephews in your own firm.
Pic: Ajji (Saraswathamma)

Raama thatha & the grandkids:

Vishnu and I had to take part in Geeta recitation competition at the Mahila Mandali school. You taught us the 15th chapter of Bhagavadgeeta. It was the ‘Purushottamaprapti yoga’. Who better than you to teach us that chapter? ‘Purushottama’ describes you! I remember with the tiny Geeta book in your hand, you would sit on your mesh chair on a yellow cushion. We would be tossed up in your bed. You would make us repeat after you and also tell us the meaning of the verses. It was always harder for me to pronounce some words and Vishnu would frolic teasing me. You would mediate and tell him that I was younger and would learn in due course. Yes, you always, always supported me! You would be full of glee when we ran back to tell you that Vishnu stood the proud first while I came second at the contest.

“The best place to be when you are sad is grandpa's lap”

Winning contests meant receiving Indira Vikas Patras. You organized prize distribution ceremonies at home. You were the proud grandfather of 11 grandkids. All of us would gather on habba days and you would hand out IVPs to us. You made notes of the prizes/ranks on the individual envelopes and spelt them out while giving them. Nothing went unnoticed. This went a long way in encouraging us to do better and better.

“Nobody can do for little children what grandparents do. Grandparents sort of sprinkle stardust over the lives of little children” -- Alex Haley

An avid learner:
You were a keen reader. You adapted yourself to the changing times with your modern outlook. The newspaper was followed by Readers Digest and then it would be Adhyatma Prakasha. Mahatma Gandhi inspired you a great deal. An ardent Congress fan, you read in detail on the Gandhis. You read the scriptures, Ramayana, Mahabharata and made notes of quotes in your diary. After setting up your own firm Ramson Engineers, you mastered finance and accountancy on your own. The great urge to learn Hindi well after crossing 70 had you listening to Hindi radio programs. Then came the burning desire to learn Tamil after the age of 80! You were hooked on to ‘learn tamil in 30 days’ and other self help books. You watched Tamil movies and listened to AR Rehman’s songs with a dictionary in hand.

“Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty” -- Henry Ford

The Midas touch:
You bought land, built properties, rented them out. You built parts of Bangalore Medical College (BMC). You were rewarded by the council for completing the work at BMC well on time. You built the entire Acharya Paata Shaala (APS). You then became the President of APS. You built Saraswathi Hospital in record time in loving memory of your wife. You build the grand Mathrunilaya, our abode. It was your fantastic planning that made it the best looking and the tallest house in the neighbourhood. You thought of switches by the bedside, a bathtub of tiles, a wooden chess table cum coffee table made to order, the swing which was the highlight of the house for us kids, the rose garden terrace, et al. It was an excellent novel idea to have inscriptions of the Geeta and Upanishad inlaid in the walls atop every room. The front door says “God is the head of this house. The unseen guest at every meal. The silent listener to every conversation”. The wood craftsmanship, the tile work, the attention to detail you’ve paid could all very well make it a building of study for budding architects & builders. It stands today majestically on 8th cross, NR Colony as a living proof of your life and works.

कर्मण्येवाधिकारस्ते मा फलेषु कदाचन।
मा कर्मफलहेतुर्भूर्मा ते सङ्गोऽस्त्वकर्मणि॥
Do your duty and be detached from its outcome, do not be driven by the end product, enjoy the process of getting there -- Chapter 2, Bhagavad Gita

Pic: with cousin Vanishree, Thatha & Ananda chikkappa
Himalayan endurance:
“It is easy enough to be pleasant when life goes by with a song,
but a man worthwhile is the one who can smile when everything goes dead wrong”
You faced tough times. You emerged out of them as gold from burning coal. The first marriage didn’t give you anything more than grief. Health was neglected during the early hardworking years. Stomach ulcers, lung congestions were constant companions. The hernia must’ve burnt a lot. The hip fracture must’ve hurt a lot. You had the mental make up which could cope with any adversity.

“Reshape yourself through the power of your will...Those who have conquered themselves live in peace, alike in cold and heat, pleasure and pain, praise and blame. To such people a clod of dirt, a stone, and gold are the same...because they are impartial, they rise to great heights” -- Bhagavad Gita

Our shining star:
Your value systems, your gaambheerya, intelligence has permeated to all of us Mathrunilayans. Your love, your life, your legacy transcends…none of us can ever come close to the peaks you reached. You have lived by example and set very high standards. You did more than an average man does in a lifetime. You supported, nurtured and nourished the lives of three generations. We lost our guiding light when we lost you. I am sure you are now one of the brightest stars twinkling in the sky looking down at us and beaming. Do continue to shine upon us.

I am because you were…

Lots of love,
Your shubu

“The history of our grandparents is remembered not with rose petals but in the laughter and tears of their children and their children's children. It is into us that the lives of grandparents have gone. It is in us that their history becomes a future” -- Charles and Ann Morse

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

maybe far but not long now...

I cant wait to finish 7 more days at work. My contract ends and then yippppeeee!! I fly to India. Time somehow is ticking awfully slowly at work ever since my travel dates got confirmed. And its dreadfully boring too.
I cant wait for Nov 16th.
I cant wait to hug mum and dad. Am emotional already.
I cant wait to go home…to my sanctuary, my room…
To roam around the streets where I grew up
To catch up with friends and chat and laugh
To fight with big bro
To visit the darshinis and the jola man
To smell the wet earth (hope it rains)
To smell the dry leaves and hear the crunch when they are walked over
To eat mum’s food
To drive our good old maruti (hope I still can)
To have lychee with vanilla ice cream at corner house
To smell Indian currency
To shop for my brother’s wedding
To just laze around watching TV…oh the Bollywood stuff!
To lose myself in all that home has to offer

Tere paas hi main aa raha hoon
Apni baahein khol de
Zor se mujhko gale laga le
Mujhko phir voh pyaar de
Tu hi zindagi hai, tu hi meri mohabbat hai
Tere hi pairon mein jannat hai
Tu hi dil, tu jaan, oh maa
Maa tujhe salaam, maa tujhe salaam
Amma tujhe salaam, maa tujhe salaam